In today's Courier (12 January 2024), Jennifer Gallagher, Partner in our Family Law team, advises couples to find common ground - to try and avoid the expense of divorce - as festive pressures add further strain to cost of living tensions. She urges couples not to make any hasty decisions over divorce in the face of a fractious festive season and rising financial pressures.
January, and sometimes the first working Monday of the New Year specifically - this time falling on January 8th in Scotland following last week’s bank holidays - is often dubbed Divorce Day, with some solicitors reporting a spike in people contacting them over separation from their partners.
While the date can be seen as a trigger for change following seasonal strains - it’s often an issue they see develop throughout the month, building as Christmas bills begin landing. And, for some, that is likely to be exacerbated by the added money struggles caused by the rising cost of living. But, for couples who decide that separation is best for them and their families, they are advising not to act in the heat of the moment - so as not to add the expense of high legal fees to their financial fears.
Jennifer says that one of the most practical ways in which to minimise costs is for couples to reach as much agreement as possible themselves.
She said: “No-one likes to see a marriage come to an end. For some, though, divorce is the best course. How you approach that is critical, though, both from a wellbeing and financial perspective.
“People who get in touch with us early in the New Year have often spent months - sometimes years - thinking about divorce, but fears of upsetting families, being alone or facing a challenging financial situation have put them off. Time together over Christmas can, however, prove the tipping point.
“The cost of living crisis has created a double-whammy in many ways. Not only has it increased the strain on relationships, but the nervousness of leaving too which can end up causing health problems.
“It’s important that couples who want to separate can - and the most straightforward separations are where they find a way to communicate with each other to reach as much agreement as they can themselves over settlements.
“Lawyers can provide initial advice so that there is a general understanding of the law then help fine-tune the details or simply formalise any agreement reached which avoids the legal costs associated with lengthy negotiations or failing to avoid the courtroom.”
While all cases are unique, financial arrangements are generally where couples find they need professional guidance.
Among the tactics our lawyers deploy to reach a settlement is collaborative law, where lawyers - and perhaps experts including financial advisors and life coaches - sit with couples in an attempt to resolve more challenging issues.
Jennifer, a qualified collaborative lawyer, said: “If there are emotional hotspots causing a blockage to sensible financial negotiation this gives a forum for these to be aired, recognised and dealt with.
“Working by negotiation, you can be creative, taking account of circumstances such as tax implications and the practicalities of implementing an agreement that works for you both, rather than having something imposed in a courtroom. It’s better - and more cost-effective - for everyone.
“While it is important that couples have an understanding of how the law works, the collaborative process allows couples a way to agree anything they choose, and which works for their family in a way that litigating does not.”
Lawyers often also advise clients about how to approach their “kitchen table” discussions with their spouse, sharing advice on the possible parameters of settlement and the practical steps required.
Lindsays has noted over a number of years that there are significantly more internet searches regarding divorce in early January. In fact, more than twice the number of people see divorce-related information online during January when compared to any other month of the year.
It is their experience that this then leads to further divorce enquiries in the months ahead.
We also work with organisations including Consensus Scotland and CALM Scotland to offer relationship and mediation advice. For more details go to Consensus Scotland and Calm Scotland.
Article published 12 January 2024.
